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Mathematics Goes to the Movies
by Burkard Polster and Marty Ross
7:00
Archie Landrum (Frank Whaley) is a mathematician applying to be the handyman
at the farm owned by Katherine Samuel (Blythe Danner).
ARCHIE: Come on, Mrs. Samuel. The ad says “small farm, private quarters,
decent hours, hard worker”. It doesn’t in any way exclude someone
who has a PhD in mathematics.
KATHERINE: No, but it probably should have.
ARCHIE: You have my references. Three summers, while other grad students were
out trying to solve the mysteries of the Universe, I was wrestling with whether
it was better to plant yellow granos or conquistador.
8:00
Gilbert Tellez (Danny Nucci) is the local policeman, being interviewed.
GILBERT: Why would she hire him? If you want protection or somebody to take
of your place, you really gonna hire a mathematician?
21:00
Archie is in jail, objecting to Gilbert referring to him as “Mister Landrum”.
ARCHIE (To his lawyer): Here the way my only friend talks to me? (To Gilbert)
That’s Doctor to you, Gibby. If you’re gonna call me “Mister”,
call me “Doctor”.
24:00
Katherine’s and her daughter Lucy (Sheryl Lee) are fighting about Lucy’s
depression, and Archie offers his opinion.
LUCY: Um, excuse me, Archie, but who invited you into this conversation?
KATHERINE: Hey, Come on, now. He lives here.
LUCY: He has a PhD in mathematics and he makes soup!
35:00
Lucy has been criticising a movie script, The Journey to Galaxy 16, written
by Archie for her.
ARCHIE: O.K. O.K. Maybe you didn’t understand the symbology behind the
journey to Galaxy 16. Maybe the infinity concept confused you. That’s
a good point. Good, I can simplify that aspect of it. Good. Fine. Thank-you.
Simplify infinity. What else?
59:00
Archie has just received a call from Princeton, offering him an academic position.
KATHERINE: Job offer?
ARCHIE: Nine morons at Princeton, sitting around inventing truth.
KATHERINE: Well, somebody’s gotta do that work. But that’s wonderful,
Archie, that they want you.
ARCHIE: I get job offers all the time, Mrs. Samuel. I may be a completely inept
human being, but I’m an incredible mathematician.